For everyone involved in a divorce, the going is tough and gets tougher before it gets better. Most of all, divorce is rough on children. Confusion, worry, and a plethora of other emotions are bound to influence children when their parents split up. Even in the best situations, it can be scary. Easing the impact of divorce is a difficult but necessary task for parents who are already reeling from an unfortunate situation themselves.
Naturally, the entire process of a divorce will be difficult for all parties concerned. But for it to run relatively smoothly, there are steps you can take to help your child through the progression.
It’s important to prepare your child properly for facing the divorce of their parents. There are going to be any number of conversations taking place, so make sure that you’re prepared (as much as possible) for them. Early on, talk through your child’s concerns and feelings. You’ll only be able to offer appropriate support if you know where they’re coming from.
Your child will now be facing things they probably never imagined, so try to prepare them for what’s to come. Before changes start happening, help them mentally get ready to face the future. It’s going to take time, but get them accustomed to the upcoming situation. Be patient. They’ll need to be shielded from some information, it’s true, but be as honest and informative as you can. Let them know that they may need to be informed of certain things at a later date. But all will be revealed in good time.
Easy Does It
It’s unlikely that you jumped headfirst into the decision to divorce. So, time must also be taken to help your child prepare for what’s to come. If all big changes happen in quick succession or right away, it will overwhelm your child. If possible, use a series of stages to plan the separation process.
For example, if one parent will be moving out, try to give your child/children as much warning as possible. This will give them time to adjust to a new situation and adapt appropriately. More changes are likely to come, but let them handle one thing at a time.
Introducing your child to where you or your divorcing spouse will be living may help them accept the situation and better deal with it. Rather than your child being faced with a scary mystery, try to give them solid ideas as to what’s going on and what’s going to happen. Let them know that, even though one parent is moving out, the child will not be left behind.
introducing your child to a new love interest is something that must be done carefully, gradually, and gently. While your child is still dealing with the divorce may not be the best time. Again, take one thing at a time, be patient, be as honest as possible, and be clear.
Getting Divorced? Who Can You Turn To?
Attorney Romanowski is a a bona fide authority in family law. If you find yourself facing a divorce, Romanowski Law Offices can help. Request an expert consultation today. Find out why more and more people put their trust in New Jersey’s top divorce lawyer.
Curtis J. Romanowski, ESQ. is the author of the highly recognized treatise: Child Custody, Protection & Support (now in its Fifth Edition, and voted NJ Super Lawyer – Family Law, 2005-2021).